The mental pain has been unbearable.
Perhaps my divorce was worse. Perhaps that time at my old school when the principal and superintendent came down on me hard was worse.
But this is the most prolonged pain I have ever felt.
The leg. The boyfriend. My dog and cat being put down. My boyfriend's mom being sick. Court for my ex-husband. The move (not a BAD thing, but stressful). Baring my soul at counseling. Fighting with my brother and sister-in-law. The court thing today.
Just... crap. Over and over. And my typical coping mechanism (besides writing) is to curl away and forget, but that's not an option right now.
I keep telling myself that it has to get better, but that's not really the case. I'll likely be single again soon. My dog and cat are gone; new ones will replace them, eventually, but it won't stop me from remembering the pain in my son's eyes. I don't know that I will ever make up with my brother and sister-in-law; I currently have no desire to.
But, hey. I'm alive, the kid's okay, and I've still got a cat named Squishy. So, fuck it all.
NGS? Pain?
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