I was outside, in my backyard.
He was there too.
After it was over, I was scared.
So, so scared.
For months, the police came.
Officer Charm was there, usually.
Report after report.
Finally, the restraining order.
I was safe, but not safe.
Not on the inside.
I'd hide myself away.
If I was outside, he might drive past and see me.
One time, he left a note on my mailbox.
No signature, but it was him.
Threatening emails.
Threatening voicemails.
Back to the police.
By the time it was over,
I could barely leave my house.
Even when that boy moved in.
Even then.
Until one day, years later, we moved.
Now, I'm in a place where I don't worry when I step past the door.
I can talk to my neighbors. Outside.
I can walk to the mailbox without looking over my shoulder.
I can send my kid outside and not stand in the doorway, heart racing.
He doesn't know where I am.
I still flinch, I'm told, when a hand comes near me.
But I'm better.
I'm not fixed, but I'm better.
I can go outside and see the sky.
NGS made me laugh via text today. She's the best.
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