2.16: Beauty - A definition

He stood in front of the bathroom mirror, in all his 6-year old glory, brushing his teeth while singing a song.

"I brush my teeth... I look gooooood...."

The performance brought myself and the boyfriend to teary-eyed giggles, trying to be quiet.

He doesn't always have that self-confidence. He did until he got to school, and then the other kids tore it out of him, just like every kid does to everyone else.

My mom, 67 years beautiful, sat in a chair today, in my living room, looking at something on my iPAD. I snapped a picture and showed it to her.

"Don't post that," she said. "I look awful. I always look awful."

67 years of not knowing that she's beautiful. She's beautiful because of who is she and how much she loves. It has nothing to do with her face. Her face, by the way, is what I think of when I think of the word "love". It's the most beautiful thing in the world to me.

It's me, 5 years ago, newly divorced. I yearn to find someone else to connect to. I'm terrified to post a picture of myself online, knowing that some drunken jock five states away will make some disparaging comment. I can't handle it, and so I post other pictures, putting my name to someone else's face. 

The only payoff is 5 minutes of compliments that have nothing to do with me. Compliments that only make me hate myself more. But at least I'm not alone, right?

We are visual people, but the views of beauty that we measure ourselves by aren't real. Airbrushing, photoshop, selective angles, personal trainers, drugs.

I am beautiful because I'm NOT perfect. I'm beautiful because I love and laugh and nurture and try. I'm beautiful because I write and support and help. I'm beautiful because I always have a kind word for everyone.

That's what beauty is.

NGS is beautiful, too.